Mercy Clause

I am back on this topic
I spent the week despite the external chaos
thinking internally about Love
and what it is
I am not sure that I know really
maybe it is a vague thing
or maybe it is many things all under the same heading
I think that Love actually might be Mercy
I know that sometimes Love can be measured by action
but mostly I think not
I think we probably don't all love the same or feel the same or think the same about love
but the thing is- is that God is Love
so as I try and see with no eyes
and understand though I am a fool
I do want to know what Love is
so that I can maybe have and give more of it away.
Because I don't think that real Love is selfish or about desire or covetousness
I don't think real Love is about comfort and ease and bounty
So what is real Love?
I believe that Love and Peace go hand and hand
But what does that mean for me?
What does it mean if I actually probably spend more time judging and hating than loving and edifying? How does Jesus fit into all this? Jesus came to show us how to love. He said to love our enemies. What if sometimes I can barely tolerate my own family and "Loved Ones"? Where does this all leave me?
How do I change?
How do I Love more?
The only thing that I do know that is not really fun- is that often when I go through really difficult experiences, it does make me more compassionate to others- because I realize that I have no idea what other people are going through, no idea what bondage or tests or weariness another is actually going through- and so I learn to show some mercy.. so that's something- but sort of scary because who wants to suffer to learn how to love?
Can't I just Love by snapping my fingers? maybe you can..?

am I rambling? I'm rambling.
but maybe thats also the thing
Love goes in circles
we give love we get peace

This is for you-

Though I may never get the chance to be completely honest with you about all this garbage going on here- I am going to say something-

I can't send this to you in case of a terrible rebuttal and a repetition of getting the Hammer like yesterday- but maybe, just hear this:

Maybe there is someone close to you who is not telling you the truth about things, maybe you like them- even love them, respect them and need them. So, I am not suggesting that anything should be done about this deceit, except maybe just double check when you hear a story; maybe just ask the other person their version just in case there is some oversight.

You told me that you hate- Hate, and that is well and good,
and so I will tell you that I really have a distaste for Deceit.

I am so far from being perfect- but please don't think that you know the whole story just because you heard something from one source.

I have found more than one story to be inaccurate and false, more than one explanation wholly lacking. Be on Guard.

Respectfully Yours,

Love is Forgiveness

even for those who don't want it or ask for it
Have I mentioned that I have been sick?
Isn't there some sort of Mercy Law in this world that when someone
is truly ill that we just leave them alone
Should we maybe skip the kicking them while they are down thing?
this long weekend should have started long ago

an up date from un der

the pangs of sickness
and depths of dark
have reminded me
to speak less
to forgive more
life is way too short
to waste a day or even moments
on vengeance and wrath
i need every day
for the sake of the spiritual
i fear i am truly an empty vessel
i fear i am a vessel of dishonour
i know that not one ounce of what i have or am that is good or blessed
is from mine own hand
i hope that i am in the vine
that i will not be cast off
i am sorry often
because i see myself
from the shores of eternity
and have nothing to show
nor treasure to bear
for all the work and gifts that have been bestowed upon me
those who love the most understand the most

a personal fave

to the pure all things are pure

i'm just gonna say it

a thought that has been brewing and now full throttle
i just read an article titled "how you know you are a christian"
and in it it said that Jesus claimed to be God (those words)
this was written by an educated respected Christian in our present society

this is so un True that I actually feel ill right now as I write this

Jesus never ever once said that he was God
Jesus was not God
Jesus said over and over that he was the Son of God

there are times even in the scripture where a seperate voice from heaven spoke audibly and said " this is my beloved Son "

I am so honestly confused- why on earth do the majority of christians living on this planet believe that Jesus was God?

I am sorry if I am offending any one right now- I just don't get it-

and so, maybe you think tomaato-tomauto- but it's not that easy
this fundamental difference changes everything
everything from the top to the bottom
how you and I fit into this story
or don't
this week i was reminded that i am just a human
i bend and break
i get tired and i have limits
i grow weak and often fail
sometimes i get it all done and fix it all up and say the right thing or write the right thing
but mostly i am a hodge-podge of mediocrity
probably much like you.
i have scars and scabs and grey hairs
i have a double chin(i think) and too many moles
i often need forgiveness from others
for my short sighted ness
sometimes the f-bomb drops from my lips
sometimes pride and condemnation seeps from my eyeballs

basically a smoothie
lots of stuff blended
is there any one left on the planet that does not use microfibre cloths to clean?
is there anything on Gods green earth
quite so strange and deliberate
and striking
as a peacock?


is not a virus to me

it is the initials of my dearOne

and strangely,

also the initials of the person who made my ring

and so engraved on my ring

next to my skin

are the initials


and so I think and remember always

sometimes our vows are for something more

than ourselves

Hope ##### ######

Hope- because I knew I needed more hope in this life-

V#####- because of my husbands grandma and her example to him- her testimony of christianity

P#####- my great grandmother- the first on our tree to find and love and follow the gospel

so daughter Hope

we gave you your name

for more than names sake

because of our hope

that you would live like those you were named after

that you would always have hope in your heart- like a living trust in God

that you would be an influence like V#### for good

that you would be remembered like P#### for her sweet spirit and courage

you have a heritage

well worth living up to

a name to uphold

with joy

bless you my daughter Hope

bless your sweet little soul

ekklēsia), “‘congregation’”

From Latin congregātiō, from congregare "to herd together", itself from com- "together" + gregare "to collect into a flock, gather" (from grex "a flock, herd"); adopted c.1340 by the English Bible translator William Tyndale, to render the Greek (ekklesia) ('those called together, (popular) meeting'; hence Latin ecclesia 'church') in his New Testament, and preferred by 16th century Reformers instead of church

congregation (plural congregations)
A gathering of faithful in a Christian church, Jewish synagogue, mosque or other place of worship. It can also refer to the people who are present at a devotional service in the building, particularly in contrast to the pastor, minister, imam, rabbi etc. and/or choir, who may be seated apart from the general congregation or lead the service (notably in responsary form).
A Roman Congregation, a main department of the Vatican administration of the universal church
A corporate body whose members gather for worship, or the members of such a body.
Any large gathering of people
The collective noun for eagles.

dis big

sacred journey

fabulous store in inglewood
makes me want to cry
because people should spend their money there
instead of the Brick

why M day was a good day

because I forgot
because I had zero expectations
because of a nice call
some nice visits
and flowers from a sweet girlfriend