til death do us part
soooo
there's one other wee topic that i have wanted to venture in
but have been putting off
i just want you all to know that things can change
everyone for sure knows that Scott and I were seperated in 2010 for the year. and previous to that our marriage was umm,... like it really sucked. there are no words to describe a terrible marriage and if you have never lived in one then just be very very very thankful. there are other words i could use to describe it but i won't. so we had a very real true seperation in which i had no hope what so ever that things would work out. just ask those who were close to me. i thought my life was essentially over. as you may know i live by Jesus' words (i think Matt. 6 etc.) that those who marry someone who is divorced is committing adultery... in other words we marry once. unless death .
anyway
bad writing skills today
i am sick and my back hurts
ok where was i?
so i thought for sure no more kids and single hood for life which wasnt at all what i had "planned/hoped".
anyway i don't know what happened
i know that I believe God gave me a miracle
I cannot believe how good my marriage is
i truly cannot believe how much my life has changed
it is so amazing to actually discover what a good marriage feels like
it feels so easy
things can change
people can change
always believe that
there's one other wee topic that i have wanted to venture in
but have been putting off
i just want you all to know that things can change
everyone for sure knows that Scott and I were seperated in 2010 for the year. and previous to that our marriage was umm,... like it really sucked. there are no words to describe a terrible marriage and if you have never lived in one then just be very very very thankful. there are other words i could use to describe it but i won't. so we had a very real true seperation in which i had no hope what so ever that things would work out. just ask those who were close to me. i thought my life was essentially over. as you may know i live by Jesus' words (i think Matt. 6 etc.) that those who marry someone who is divorced is committing adultery... in other words we marry once. unless death .
anyway
bad writing skills today
i am sick and my back hurts
ok where was i?
so i thought for sure no more kids and single hood for life which wasnt at all what i had "planned/hoped".
anyway i don't know what happened
i know that I believe God gave me a miracle
I cannot believe how good my marriage is
i truly cannot believe how much my life has changed
it is so amazing to actually discover what a good marriage feels like
it feels so easy
things can change
people can change
always believe that
so everybody and their new years resolutions
i had none
until Sunday morning rolled around
and we heard about this dude in the OT
who pleaded for mercy when he was to die
but all his life he never showed mercy.
and i thought of that verse
Blessed are the merciful for they shall obtain mercy
and i thought how truly
inept and pathetic i am at being a christian and how much i am absolutely depending on mercy
and i thought
i better step it up a notch in the mercy department
remembering where it says
there is no mercy to those who have shown no mercy
so thats my one and only goal
(yes lose weight... does that even count??)
mercy
i had none
until Sunday morning rolled around
and we heard about this dude in the OT
who pleaded for mercy when he was to die
but all his life he never showed mercy.
and i thought of that verse
Blessed are the merciful for they shall obtain mercy
and i thought how truly
inept and pathetic i am at being a christian and how much i am absolutely depending on mercy
and i thought
i better step it up a notch in the mercy department
remembering where it says
there is no mercy to those who have shown no mercy
so thats my one and only goal
(yes lose weight... does that even count??)
mercy
off to the races
2012 is already proving itself to be rather interesting
i am actually some what hesitant as to what the year will bring
2011 was so good - feels like i was perched high- wonder about falls you know?
anyway
new years eve my grandma had a heart attack
and some other family stuff is going on
today my neighbour came over and basically confessed to me that she is searching for peace and God
interesting no?
but mostly the last week i have been suffering in parental binds
and for anyone who does not have a child
or a child with a will
please just skip over
because you have no idea.
my precious daughter is essentially a 17 yr old trapped in a almost 4 body
she has no fear of any possible reprove including things not accepted by social services
this kid has a willllll. probably inherited by either one of her overly intense parents
either way latley i am just BOGGED down in not knowing how to parent.
to me latley
parenting just feels like a crap shoot( i dont even know what that means except like basically anyway you look at it you cant win) i am actually beginning to fear my child
today on the way to my parents
i thought my daughter feel asleep
and i said to my husband
oh my goodness she's a slleep - sweet heavenly bliss!
and then she woke up and made some comment and
i was like oh my goodness she is like Chucky
(for all you who dont know Chucky was like this scarry horror film doll)
i feel like she is so smart and can be so good and she is so social and gets bored so easily
but she has no fear. this past week i have thrown out numerous items over "not Listening"
now i realize i am gonna need to stop that so now we are just taking things away for a day or two or there will be nothing left ( i cant afford that)
i know parenting is probably a really boring subject for most readers and that is fine. this is who i am. i am a boring mother who is trying to parent my child and i desperatly fear having a disobedient child. why? because i love her.
love without discipline is not love
anyway. i am rambling.
advice accepted unless never tried first hand.
2012 is already proving itself to be rather interesting
i am actually some what hesitant as to what the year will bring
2011 was so good - feels like i was perched high- wonder about falls you know?
anyway
new years eve my grandma had a heart attack
and some other family stuff is going on
today my neighbour came over and basically confessed to me that she is searching for peace and God
interesting no?
but mostly the last week i have been suffering in parental binds
and for anyone who does not have a child
or a child with a will
please just skip over
because you have no idea.
my precious daughter is essentially a 17 yr old trapped in a almost 4 body
she has no fear of any possible reprove including things not accepted by social services
this kid has a willllll. probably inherited by either one of her overly intense parents
either way latley i am just BOGGED down in not knowing how to parent.
to me latley
parenting just feels like a crap shoot( i dont even know what that means except like basically anyway you look at it you cant win) i am actually beginning to fear my child
today on the way to my parents
i thought my daughter feel asleep
and i said to my husband
oh my goodness she's a slleep - sweet heavenly bliss!
and then she woke up and made some comment and
i was like oh my goodness she is like Chucky
(for all you who dont know Chucky was like this scarry horror film doll)
i feel like she is so smart and can be so good and she is so social and gets bored so easily
but she has no fear. this past week i have thrown out numerous items over "not Listening"
now i realize i am gonna need to stop that so now we are just taking things away for a day or two or there will be nothing left ( i cant afford that)
i know parenting is probably a really boring subject for most readers and that is fine. this is who i am. i am a boring mother who is trying to parent my child and i desperatly fear having a disobedient child. why? because i love her.
love without discipline is not love
anyway. i am rambling.
advice accepted unless never tried first hand.
K i am so not tech savvy and so detest when things change in the internet world. also my blogging is made almost non existent due to my non computer home and for some reason i cant figure out how to blog from my Iphone.. so theres my smart stuff for the day folks... im gonna try and post this and see if it works..
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