my stats are way down

which is kind of exciting
makes me want to say something offensive/controversial
to increase my readership
or to continue to write boring blogs
until no one ever reads again
and then i will be free

suicide bombing

an act of faith
a sure sign of Godlessness

the child is the father of the man

today i am thinking about school
what was your school like? elementary? highschool?
i'll be honest, i am terrified about putting my kid in public school
that's right-i'm one of those

when school started i went to the inner city public school and continued until graduation
i don't have many memories of wee early childhood
but i have a lot of bad ones from school
i can specifically recount times in the early grades
that make me sick
bad teachers, older bullies, friend gang drama, even "Molester games"(i will not even explain- it so wrong)
there were good teachers and good friends too,
but there is something about being a wee child and having bad, scary experiences
that maybe they are hard to let go of.
my junior high was so-so.. fights, parties, coolio contests, ups and downs
high school was the worst
from my perspective it was fine, i was having fun, doing what i wanted
basically me and all my friends smoke and drank at nauseum(sp?) all through highschool
I got in many a bad relationship, but especially topped it off
with dating The BadAss. this guy never even went to our school, just came to beat people up and sell some drugs. I really liked him.(this is no joke- this guy had just gotten out of jail for attempted murder)

anyway, suffice to say the relationship was pretty rocky, and overwhelming, and with the way I was treating myself and health at that time in my life- eventually it did lead to disaster- which actually thankfully led me back to God.

But, please help me Heaven- I don't want this happening to my daughter...
The end started at the beginning
this i know
there must be a better way

I feel like my Education had way too much to do with Survival and Anarchy
than being a kid, and learning, and feeling safe
there must be a better way

march fourth

i learned today that it is far more fun to give to someone who appreciates then who doesn't.
march forth is my birthday. i will be 33. i was reading about how botox gets rid of depression. there is a spy being held in pakistan. my new live-in thing is working out really nicely in case you all are wondering. sometimes in the middle of the night i think about blogging about this and that, and then in the morning its worn off. my grandma is ill and well, all grandmas eventually die. and so it is very real to see someone getting older and know that that may be me one day too. has any one tried the iced hot chocolate from secound cup? unbelievable. fantastic'! seek and ye shall find. don't seek and you will not find, and you will still be held accountable for what you did not try to know. scary stuff.

family day

can almost smell it
my babies birthday

my favorite day of the year